Backposts, natch.

Dear word-enthusiasts,

My new favorite bastard word is ‘natch.’ By bastard word, I mean something made up that had not existed in the New Unabridged Oxford English Dictionary at the turn of the last last century (1900). English, as I have mentioned to some friends before, is such a mutt language that there’s really no point in talking about purity or tradition. If words like ‘chillax’ and ‘fo shizzle’ can become so common as to be used by 30-somethings in everyday parlance (while ‘parlance,’ a delightfully delicious word is not oft used), then we might as well burn our hardbound dictionaries and resort to Googling ‘[insert word here] definition’ or ‘[insert word here] urbandictionary’ every time we don’t know a word. This is exactly what I do; I don’t remember the last time opening up a paper dictionary.

Confounded by the definition of ‘natch’? Have you still not googled ‘natch definition’?

If not, I’ll enable your laziness:

Tech: There’s a refill request in the queue, but the doctor approved it for tomorrow.

Me: So I’ll just have to run it through at midnight?

Tech: Yep

Me: What is it for? Hydrocodone?

Tech: Natch

I had only recently come across the bastard [word] a week earlier on Maura Kelly’s blog. She had made some interesting comment about something entirely unrelated to opiates and followed it up with ‘Natch.’

My next series of moves: Double mousepad tap ‘Natch’. Ctrl+C. Alt+T. Ctrl+V. ‘definition’. Enter. All in less than 2 seconds. In other words, select, copy, new tab, paste, type ‘definition’, and enter. Ah, the wonders of keyboard shortcuts and the Google Chrome search bar.

What’s it short for? Have you still not followed my keystrokes?

One more example before the big reveal:

So I haven’t posted since Monday of last last week due to my laziness (I guess I’m the pot in the pot & kettle metaphor) and the lack of internet at my parents’ place. And I had to drive home and back to Dallas within 2 days because I had to work the weekend after Christmas. So that’s another 9 hours I didn’t have. [insert more excuses here].

So as you can see from my very well thought out reasons which were entirely out of my control (laziness is a pre-existing medical condition which under the new healthcare reform bill, you will be unable to criticize me for), I was unable to post.

But I promise I had typed up the posts. The check really was in the mail. Scout’s honor! Not that I was ever a scout.

Blogspot has a really neat feature where you can back-post and forward-post, meaning you can predate and postdate blog entries. So I’m going to take advantage of that. Natch (naturally).